Have you ever needed to start over?

1/9/2012

When all else seems hopeless, go back to your roots.

Although my life is much of how I want it to be, there are a few areas I'd like to up the game on. I've tried several tactics, but none seem to be catching the spark, however.

Oh, what to do, what to do.

So, I'm going back to the basics of where I began a few years ago at the time of my corporate separation; back to the excitement and enthusiasm of new potential, finding my passion within.

I love to write; it is my first love, but I'm not a novelist. I discovered some time ago that I am an essayist. I write about life, how the human brain operates under certain conditions; well, it's mostly my own brain that I write about.

Yet, I find that I'm not so different; my readers reach out to tell me they have the same thoughts, or they had the same situations happen to them. First hearing the term a year or so ago, "normalizing" a situation for someone makes them feel, well, normal.

Here's an example. A friend or colleague confides in you that they have this certain yearning to pack up and head for the Brazilian mountains for a year, yet feeling a bit wacko for having such a far-fetched idea. You have the opportunity to "normalize" their feelings by simply stating, "I believe there are many people who would like to do something similar."

What you also have accomplished was to perhaps put in motion the first step in helping them to achieve that wacky notion: by giving them the permission and acceptance to dream. Who knows... you may even get a bag of those delicious coffee beans upon their return!

Back to the basics I go.

1. Go back to a time that gave you the results you now seek.
2. Remember the thoughts.
3. Recall the steps.
4. Repeat those memories one by one.
5. Refine the process to make it faster for the next time.

In the stage of my "becoming" I lost the passion for what I set out to accomplish. My focus went to the business instead of remaining at what is at the heart of my business -- people.

An idea just occurred to me. I will create a photo matrix (much like the one on Facebook) of everyone I mentored and place it where I can see it at all times. But I will also add a spot for those who request my guidance in the future.

Do you have a place, a touchstone, to return to? Can you recall what you did to gain your result? How can you apply that knowledge today, right now?

I'd love to hear about your experience; and if I can help in any way, I'd be honored; just let me know.

Dream On!
PeggyLee

"Well, back to the old drawing board."
~Peter Arno

Want To Reprint this article? You may do so as long as you leave it intact and include this author information:
Peggy Lee Hanson, personal transition guide and mentor, is expert at compassionately helping those suffering loss of any proportion, especially through unemployment. Using proven strategies and support, she teaches how to move quickly and easily through current or impending life-changing moments so that you can have the life you are meant -- and deserve -- to live.
PeggyLee is a Speaker, Best-selling author on Amazon.com, Certified Dream Coach® & Group Leader®, Trained True Purpose Coach®, and CEO and Founder of MyDreamArchitect.com, a subsidiary of Personal Transition Guidance, LLC. Also, Peggy Lee is co-facilitator and co-owner of the Coaches Circle Mastermind groups and is a regular columnist for the online community of DreamUniversity.com. She is a member of the International Coach Federation and Toastmasters International.
Follow her at PeggyLeeHanson on Twitter and Facebook. You may also subscribe to her blog and newsletter.

18 Comments

Hajra link

1/8/2012 11:23:32 pm

Hey Penny,

I love the idea of refreshing to do things faster. What happens is when we get used to a certain pattern or path we do tend to repeat it for future success but we fail to realize that the way might be altered or even bettered for better results.

Another of your inspiring works!

Lisa Kanarek link

1/9/2012 12:34:15 am

I love your idea of going back to your roots and refocusing. It's so easy to get caught up in busy work and to lost sight of what matters. This year I'm refocusing and making a conscious effort to do what I love and go back to what has worked for me before. In other words, I'm going to stop trying to reinvent the wheel.

Roy A Ackerman, PhD, EA @Cerrebrations.biz link

1/9/2012 01:46:42 am

Not quite what I think you had in mind, but there are two that work for me. One- a trip to Jerusalem, where I walk and pray by the Kotel. I can never recreate that first experience (about which I have written), but it reminds me that my mission is part of a much larger one. I need that experience at least once every few years (sometimes WAY more often).
The other is my board of directors. No, I don't necessarily mean a business meeting. We have been together a very long time. We have lost members (due to death) and we've added just a few (you know that statement that you never replace, but you can substitute or augment). We have a policy for each quarter to have one board meeting dinner with NO agenda. (Horrors!) We each get a chance to state three items- what is our hottest button right now, what we hope to see in 6 to 12 months, and what our home life weather is like. We share ideas about the last item (which sometimes includes picking up the slack to let the individual have some more time off or switching business trips to let their family have some travel time together, whatever it takes). Regarding the first two- we have no official discussion that night (or lunch). Instead, we post (on a private sharepoint site) ideas to solve the hot button- be it with staffing shifts, ideas about the concept, or resources suggestions.
The ideas of where we want to be are on a separate page, which is then tracked for the next year, where we all get to post comments as to what happened to bring that closer to fruition. It also means we keep it in mind as we all go about our "business" [pun intended] to insure that we each get fulfilled the way we hope.

Kathleen Wesselink

1/9/2012 04:17:40 am

It is most refreshing to hear someone interested in "going back to the basics or I might add, 'roots.'" Is this not what gave your life purpose in the beginning? Being reminded of my purpose is what gives me guidance throughout my day or week, or year. And yes, when I loose that focus, it seems I just motivate aimlessly through time--and that is disconcerting. Time is precious to me and I've learned to value each moment in some manner or another.

However, currently, I too, am feeling the need to refocus myself, to set a more solid direction for my life. It seems when one phase or goal is met, then I tend to become more apathetic. Possibly there is a need to allow oneself to just "wonder aimlessly in the wilderness" for a period to be able to regroup for the next adventure.

I like the idea of going to Jerusalem for a visit to walk and pray at the Kotel, but (what I was going to write here, I know realize is not the truth--I was going to say, "but it isn't possible for me to do this" when inwardly I know "all things are possible," if I believe they are!) Therefore, I now realize my next mission will be to visit my "Jerusalem" or a place where I may refocus my life's goals and refresh my spirit. Now that excites me!

Thank you all for bringing me to this point!

Kathleen Wesselink, DTM
Past District Governor of District 35 Toastmasters

Richard link

1/9/2012 04:35:34 am

Thanks for this post. I found myself getting off track trying to find a track. I recently went through a box of papers from college at my parents house and found a career assessment I completed. I saw that what I was doing was actually what the assessment stated and what I was trying to do was in an area of weakness on the assessment.

It's good to rewind, recall, and refine. Looking forward to what is to come from restarting.

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 05:39:44 am

Hi Hajra,
Yes, the last step of looking where we can cut corners to make our process quicker and cleaner is one that is the most often overlooked.
Thank you for the kind words and for leaving a comment! I love seeing you here!
Dream On!

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 05:47:45 am

Hi Lisa,
Your comments reminded me why I return to the basics. When first in the technical publication world writing procedures, it occurred to me that upper management often forgot the path in which put them in their current seat; meaning the low-end steps were lost within high-end documentation. In other words, a disconnect occurs. Keeping in touch with the subordinate (person, idea, etc.) retains sight of what matters.
So glad you stopped by today. Thank you!

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 05:57:35 am

Roy,
That's exactly what I mean! Any experience which calls to mind that grounds and connects you, especially if your purpose is recalled. And the business part you described is exactly what I wrote in response to Lisa. I hope other businesses take your lead to find that connection, that "fix" to help not only your business but your employees, too. Awesome response, my friend. You blew me away.
Thank you for stopping by and leaving your thoughtful words.

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 06:04:35 am

Hello Kathleen
You stopped to reframe the idea of Jerusalem! LOVE IT! And yes, you can do anything you want by putting into action the steps that will take you to your destination. You're the only one who stops yourself. A whole different post ;-) LOL
So glad you visited. Thank you! I appreciate you greatly!

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 06:14:31 am

Welcome Richard,
Awesome about the college assessment! Did you change to an area then that was stronger per the assessment? Just curious.
Many don't want to go back because it can be a painful process; yet, those who choose to return willingly generally finds pearls of wisdom.
Thank you very much for stopping by and taking the time to comment. Your thoughts are appreciated.
Dream On!

Roberta Budvietas link

1/9/2012 06:40:21 am

What a wonderful tip for Get Out Of Stuck too. May just think of asking for that as a reprint. One thing about working on purpose is that when you need to go back it is often to purpose. As Roy said we are here on earth as part of a greater plan and each day we have a responsibility, I believe, to do our best. That does not mean that everything works but it does mean we can live without regret. Will definitely share on FB. Thanks PeggyLee

PeggyLee link

1/9/2012 08:44:53 am

Roberta,
You certainly may use this post -- just copy it in full with the information at the bottom. I'm honored!
Going back to purpose recenters, renews, and rejuvenates us , while replenishing the enthusiasm in what we do. If it doesn't, then it's time to re-examine our true purpose. I loved exploring mine with Tim Kelley and Jeffrey Van Dyk.
Appreciate your kind words and sharing them here.
Dream On!

Veronica Campos-Hallstrom link

1/9/2012 11:02:41 pm

While it is a great starting point to find what brought you to your comfort zone once, moving from that confidence point is a goal once you look back in reflection. Reaching for happiness and a spot that will push you forward is a process.

Janette Fuller link

1/10/2012 04:38:34 am

I like what you said about going back to your roots. I worked as a school librarian for many years but did not have time to read as much as I would have liked. I was always handling books but didn't have time to enjoy them.
Now, I really enjoy reading and writing book reviews. I think this is a way that I have come back to my roots.
Thanks for a great article, PeggyLee!

PeggyLee link

1/10/2012 04:57:16 am

Yes, it is a process, Veronica; life, work, play. One thought occurred to me while reading through the comments: I hope to always remember where I came from. For if I lost sight of that, I lose that insight, that compassion, for those who follow me. For that is where they are now and where I must be for them.
I appreciate your stopping by and look forward to more of your thought-provoking comments.
Dream On!

PeggyLee link

1/10/2012 05:07:36 am

Hi Janette,
That is a wonderful story! My sister was a librarian by degree, but did not pursue the career after obtaining her Masters; I will share with her your late romance of enjoying books today.
Blessings and gratitude!

Bonnie link

1/10/2012 06:12:30 am

It's so important to get back to the 'why' of what you are doing isn't it? It gives you almost a rebirth in motivation excitiment. I've likened it to how you must reboot your computer once in a while to keep it running optimal. We need a reboot too in a sense.
I really like your example of how we can encourage others by simply allowing their wants, feelings and dreams to be real for them. Normalizing the crazies is the best way to live.

Thanks for this reminder PeggyLee!

Lynn Brown link

1/11/2012 07:59:41 am

Looking back can be helpful for seeing yourself to move forward. But I never regret or feel ashamed of current or past times. I like to think that each day brings us that moment to reflect even if it was just an hour ago, lol! Because what we have experienced so far will always stay with us. Focus is one thing I have learned and your message here is a wonderful reminder of how important it is to do that. Thank you for sharing PeggyLee.

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I not only like to write but I also like to take pictures.

The rainbow is from one stormy afternoon looking east from my front door.

Below is Lake Pepin along Lake City, Minnesota one spring day a few years ago.

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