A situation occurred involving an old friend of hers; Patty was in the hospital with a condition that was very grave. In the dream, Alice remembers Patty in the white bed, head raise a bit, dressed in dark clothing. The walls were close and had a medium-colored paneling on them (not unlike her home!). Alice had been talking with Patty when Patty’s husband, Klue, walked in. Inaudible words were exchanged.
Another woman walked into the room and lay down on the hospital bed beside Alice’s friend. She knew this person in the dream but not in her consciousness. Nearly immediately Alice became slightly jealous that Patty’s friend snuggled up and began talking with her.
It wasn’t until she woke up that Alice noticed Patty and Klue were not looking the same at all; each had changed in their looks; Patty was extremely thin, Klue had dark hair, and their faces were unrecognizable, too. How’s that for a euphemism or awareness or metaphor for ya? They were the same people inside, yet so very different on the outside.
The time of many months has passed since they last spoke in real life; Alice’s head is telling her that Patty has changed her life to not include Alice. The dream was a way of showing Alice how that it is true and certain; just as the faces of her friends changed and unrecognizable, so is the friendship of today. Alice’s heart is very sad.
Nothing has happened directly to Alice; however, many happenstances surrounding her have had a definite impact. Alice woke up shaking with extreme sadness as to the reality and awareness: Patty has moved on and is not the same person she was while together in their relationship of friendship.
People do change as do relationships of all kinds. To be able to accept these changes can be a challenge. But if you can view the situation for what it is, a transition or an evolvement in your own life of which has made you stronger and wiser, might the circumstances be a little softer and easier to digest?
If you find yourself in Alice’s shoes, here are a few tips for you.
1. Step back.
2. Look at the situation from a distance.
3. View objectively what transpired.
4. Take a few deep, cleansing breaths.
5. Recall the goodness and benefits received from the relationship.
6. Release the hold.
In summary, when you are able to look at what’s happened without judgment on either side (yours or your friend’s) a new awareness may come over you of what could have made this relationship better. Take the cleansing air in along with all the good that came out of knowing this person. Then on the exhale, blow out all of the bad, the hurt, and the pain of the loss.
Transitions can transform into transcendence, providing you with a new opportunity to create better relationships today and tomorrow. Trust your transition.
"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."
~J. K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone
note: I wrote this installment before looking at today’s quote I receive from A Fresh Perspective. Nothing is left to chance.
Peggy Lee Hanson, personal transition guide and mentor, is expert at compassionately helping those suffering loss of any proportion, especially through unemployment. Using proven strategies and support, she teaches how to move quickly and easily through current or impending life-changing moments so that you can have the life you are meant -- and deserve -- to live.
PeggyLee is a Speaker, Best-selling author on Amazon.com, Certified Dream Coach® & Group Leader®, Trained True Purpose Coach®, and CEO and Founder of MyDreamArchitect.com, a subsidiary of Personal Transition Guidance, LLC. Also, Peggy Lee has co-facilitated mastermind groups and appeared as a regular columnist for online communities. She is a member of Toastmasters International.
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